A lot of people have been complaining about the Apple glitch, which has lasted about a week and types in the place of an “i” an “A” followed by a question mark in a box. Because I blame most problems on my children, when it showed up on my phone, I assumed one of them had created an unauthorized autocorrect.
Not so! This is an Apple problem, and we’re more than a week into it. The official word is you have to update your operating system and all will be well, but there’s some indication that hasn’t fully solved the problem. It’s also worth noting iPhone users got this glitch in the first place as a result of, wait for it, updating their operating systems.
There is a hack you can use to fix it, but it doesn’t fix it in all apps all the time.
Go to Settings, General, Keyboard, and finally Text Replacement. Next, select the + in the upper right-hand corner, then type a lowercase ‘i’ into the ‘phrase’ line and an uppercase ‘I’ into the ‘shortcut’ line and tap ‘save.’ You might have to do this twice for it to work.
After reading this, you may not want to.
In the meantime, it occurred to me that Apple is always giving us new products we didn’t think or know we needed or wanted until we had them. An iPod? Seems fussy. Can’t I just listen to my music on this boombox like a normal person? The iPad? Sounds like a hygiene product, and why do I need some Goldilocks screen that’s between the size of my computer and my phone? Pshaw, I’ll never have one of those.
What if this is just one more? Forthwith, seven uses for the iPhone “i” glitch you may not have figured out. Why didn’t Tim Cook just explain them to us in front of a big ol’ screen with a Britney mic on?
1. Trolling Apple via Football Stadium
This is some very large-scale trolling and I love it. At an Ohio State game this Saturday, the student section participated in the traditional “O-H-I-O” cheer, during which the sections of the stadium spell out each letter. The students are designated “I,” and instead gave the stadium and national TV audience this treat.
Ohio State trolling Apple
— Brian Havrilla (@brianhavrilla) November 11, 2017
2. End Every Sentence Like a Canadian
Our neighbors to the North have a charming verbal tic wherein they end statements and questions alike with “eh?” Now you can text like them!
“So, I was pretty wasted last night, A [?]”
“I got a new haircut, A [?]”
3. Clarify the Answer to a Multiple-Choice Question
This comes up a lot during one’s standardized testing years, particularly if you’re cheating.
“The answer is A [?]”
4. Answer Demands to Know What You Bought for a Present
I’m a big fan of surprises, and I don’t like having them ruined for me or ruining them for others, even if they want them ruined. So, when someone is after you about what’s in the box or hidden in the closet or under the Christmas tree, Apple has provided a very literal answer.
“What are you getting for your birthday? A [?]”
A question mark inside a box. Boom.
5. When You Find a Suspicious Package on the Subway
This is the less cheery version of a question mark inside a box. I’m not sure there’s a text version of “see something, say something,” but if there were, Apple has you covered.
6. To Text Incognito about a Sidechick Whose Name Begins with A
Lisa, Angela, Pamela, Renee. I love you, but this only works with A. But if you do have an A in your life about whom you’d like to subtly text, have at it, A [?].
7. To Text Subtly about Sidechicks— Up to 26—You Have Given Alphabetical Designations
Sure, this only works for one right now, but one can bet Apple has foreseen your need for 26 shortcuts to name your various sidechicks and is on it.